Your reputation will always precede you, for good and for bad; so it makes sense to model it yourself, right?

One anecdote about Cuban cigars is the perfect example of the thing that you should always do about it:

The American publisher Alfred Knopf was boarding a train one day and he went straight for the smoking car.

He sat down next to a gentleman of good manners. Like Hannibal Lecter but without the psycho part, I guess.

Knopf took out one of his special cigars and lit it.

After a couple puffs, he offered another cigar to his neighbor. The gentleman lit it and after a couple puffs, said:

— This is a magnificent cigar, indeed

Pleased with the man’s good taste, Knopf replied:

— It should be. These cigars are specially put up for me by Upmann.

— Oh, really? —said the stranger —May I ask your name, Sir?

— Alfred Knopf. May I ask yours?

— Upmann.

You can imagine a sitcom-esque laugh track right after that punchline.

The Upmann’s family reputation on Cuban cigars had trascended frontiers in the early XX century.

But the most important part of the story should be Mr. Upmann’s reaction to his train neighbor’s good remarks.

He asked for his name.

Before revealing that he was responsible for the product they both had in their hands at the moment, he focused on something more important:

The personal part of the business relationship.

By the way, “that’ Upmann was the third generation of his family to craft and sell Cuban cigars.

Even so, he focused on that personal touch; Knopf’s name.

You could say he did it out of being polite but that’s my point.

Yes, your reputation speaks for yourself. Or, better put, speaks before you.

So it’s an extremely effective way of priming other’s judgment about you; make sure it’s a positive way.

But when it’s your turn to talk, make sure you add warmth to that hard-earned influence.

A common mistake is to express false modesty; yes, maybe you feel flattered and want to tone it down.

Don’t do it. It will be like rejecting the kind words – not good. Better yet, turn the conversation towards the person.

Everybody loves to talk about themselves.

Make good use of your reputation and let it speak on your behalf to the thousands, if not millions, of people that you can’t reach directly.

When they reach out – and they will – make them feel good and smart.

Additional tip: always remember one thing about them.

Charisma is an art that leads to success; and yes, it can be learned through systems.

The easiest route is to learn with my body language and persuasion tips, compiled with my 90+ tips ebook that you can download right here:

Much success!

Jesús Enrique Rosas
I can read your body language and write a story about it.