People are often vague with their words, and misinterpretation can be costly if you don’t pay attention. This cigar anecdote proves that:
When Calvin Coolidge was president of the United States, one visitor to the White House asked him for a cigar.
The reason for such an overfamiliar request, given the circumstances, was a friend who collected bands from the favorite cigars of celebrity smokers.
Coolidge kindly opened his humidor, picked up a cigar, removed the band, and handed it to the man before replacing the bandless cigar in the box.
Because what mattered was the band, right?
In all cases, the president did exactly what was requested of him: not the cigar itself, but the band.
But for that, he had to listen the whole ‘story’, or the reason behind the request.
It happens all the time; people ask us for something, perhaps an object, or an action, or a favor. Anything. And we, in the haste of not really listening, do not pay attention to what people REALLY want or need from us.
Like if someone asks you for money to buy food, instead of giving them money you give them food.
Makes sense?
Sadly, it’s usually faster, cheaper, easier to misinterpret people. Just act upon the superficial message.
In Coolidge’s case, it would have cost him a cigar.
In other cases, it could be worse.
Just make sure that when someone asks you for something, anything, you listen to their words but also read between the lines to define intention.
That will tell you a lot about the person… and they will be delighted that you understood them so well!
Go beyond literal words. I promise it’s worth it!
Much Love and Bliss,
Jesús
The Body Language Guy.
P.S. Don’t forget to download my FREE 100+ Body Language tips, using this link: https://knesix.com/tips
