It's easy to imagine that handshakes are the most common form of greeting worldwide. Yes, there are cultural exceptions, but if you're doing business or even meeting new friends wherever you go, it's highly likely that you're going to engage with this centuries-old traditional gesture. There are MANY factors that we could mention about handshakes. Who initiates the gesture, what your posture should be, eye contact, make sure that your hand isn't moist (that's why I ALWAYS advise you against having your right hand in your pocket - the left one might get a pass!), how ample the 'shaking', and so ... [keep reading...]

I got this interesting question yesterday (remember that you can ask me anything just writing to jrosas@knesix.com!): “What happens when the person being analyzed shows no emotions, no gestures, no micro expressions or anything? when she remains impassive without showing absolutely anything on her face? what does that mean?” It has happened to me a couple times. I call this kind of people ‘blanks’. They’re pretty much emotionless. Yes, they can smile, laugh, grimace and show frustration but their emotional reactions are so subtle that it’s hard to see any relevant markers to determine what’s going on under the hood. Luckily, ... [keep reading...]

I get these questions a lot. "I am too expressive... I would like to tone down my gestures" "How can I control my body language and not get nervous?" "Sometimes I think people misinterpret my face" Here's the thing: you can control your body language, but you don't really want to control your body language. Let me explain. I used to be a 'controlled body language' advocate. Assume postures and gestures to execute at any given time. It worked... sometimes. To be honest, it worked only once, when I gave a 38-minute lecture back in 2012 which I rehearsed to every ... [keep reading...]

Few people are comfortable with society being just a big masquerade ball where everyone conceals their identities… and their intentions. This story of a baseball player going incognito at a hotel, sums it up pretty well: Ted Williams was an American outfielder with a temper. He wasn’t by any means, the sweetest person. One rainy night, he was checking in at a nondescript hotel. The lobby was empty and silent. The clerk recognized him straight away as he approached the front desk. Williams noticed the manager's body language and knew he had recognized him. We are talking about the 1940s, so ... [keep reading...]

Detecting lies is, without a doubt, one of the most attractive topics in body language. Although it may seem a very difficult feat, the most important thing is to get used to observing the attitudes of the people you interact with on a daily basis. The more you study the body language of others, the more sensitive you will become to the changes in attitude that inevitably accompany a falsehood. The problem arises when you think there's only one method for spotting deception, when in fact it's a skill set that also includes asking questions. Here are seven key clues to ... [keep reading...]

Since we're in a constant bath of loud stimuli, body language goes unnoticed most of the time. But there's a secret switch deep inside your limbic system that you can consciously turn open, this way: Think of body language as if it were a communication channel. Let's imagine that words are a bright blue channel that originates in the mouth of people. Body language is a bright red that originates from the chest. Every time someone speaks, you can 'see' the blue channel oscillating like a frequency analyzer. Of course, if the person goes silent, the blue line goes dormant too. ... [keep reading...]

No doubt about it: Lie detection is the topic that has generated the most interest in my website since its origins. The process of uncovering falsehoods at a glance has connected me with many people who want to know how to tell fact from fiction. Unfortunately, this popularity has also generated enough "Lie Detection Gurus", who claim to have almost psychic powers over human behavior; they claim to detect when someone is lying from mere gestures. Just by making such a claim, they raise suspicions. Lie detection 'sells', there is no doubt about it. I remember a live broadcast in Mexico; ... [keep reading...]

Maybe you've never tried to 'fake it till you make it' with your body language. But if you wonder why it sometimes your body does the exact opposite of what you are truly feeling, here's the reason: Yes, your body language sparks from your limbic system, but its final expression is also filtered through your reasoning. You're aware of your own feelings and maybe you either want desperately to communicate them, or on the contrary hide them so nobody notices. In either scenario, your rational mind garbles your body expression. That's why innocent people can send guilt signals during an interrogation. ... [keep reading...]

When someone asks me about how long they should keep eye contact, I often mention the 5 second rule. Not that locking your eyes for longer is wrong, but you should be aware of what happens inside you: We already know through scientific research that long stares release oxytocin, which in turn makes us feel good. But that's just half of the story, because you and I perfectly know how uncomfortable can it be if someone just keeps staring at us for no reason! That's because eye contact is an intimate communication. Our "windows to the soul" speak at all times, ... [keep reading...]